How to share the load

To lessen the impact of caregiving, share responsibilities with family members or friends who can either supplement your caregiving or help you manage other responsibilities.

Asking for help may be difficult for any number of reasons. You might be afraid people will say no. It may require you to examine your own needs, educate other people about caregiving and trust others to complete tasks you normally do.

To make it easier to ask for help and make the best of others' efforts:

• Be realistic. Caregiving is demanding. Asking for help doesn't make you inadequate or selfish.
• Make a list. Create a list of a variety of tasks that could be done to support you: grocery shopping or other errands, going for a walk or reading with the person in your care, doing house or yard work, preparing a meal, or organizing bills or other paperwork.
• Consider abilities and interests. Suggest a task that best fits a friend's or family member's ability to help. While some may have the skills or patience to spend time with the person in your care, others may be more comfortable with a task that's less direct.
• Plan ahead. As much as possible, give someone advance notice for when you need help. Scheduling times for support enables your helper and you to plan and prioritize tasks.
• Be clear. When you ask for help, be clear about what you need. Avoid watering down your request by saying things like, "It's only a thought."